Caring Across Generations Takes Care on Tour

Last week, I headed into New York City to catch Caring Across Generations Care on Tour stop in Midtown Manhattan. As part of their summer campaign, the organization hit the road to highlight the importance of affordable, accessible care across the United States. Although I had been following the tour stops on Instagram, I felt it was essential to show up in person to listen to other caregivers’ stories and support this initiative in my city.

Caregiving is a topic that we discuss more frequently these days, whether it’s taking care of an aging loved one or raising a child. However, the conversation often ends with a “good luck with everything” or an “I’m thinking of you” among friends, coworkers, and even family members. We don’t truly grasp what it means daily for someone to be a caregiver or consider if their own needs are being met. But we should, because one day, everyone will either need care or become a caregiver. With more than 53 million people providing care to someone in the United States—a number that’s expected to grow as our population ages—chances are high that sooner or later, these conversations will affect you too.

The truth is that our economy runs on care. Did you know that there is no federal policy that provides paid family and medical leave or paid sick days for all workers? That the average cost of childcare is $10,000 annually? Or that direct care workers who provide critical care and are the second-largest occupation in the United States, earn less than $24,000 a year? 

I was shocked when my grandmother entered a long-term care facility in 2021. Not only did I experience the current caregiving crisis firsthand when I saw how overworked the staff was, but also when I discovered the costs associated with having a loved one in a nursing home (which can run around $100K a year). I thought, surely, the United States can do better than this? 

But I was wrong. For the next two years, I spent every night with my grandmother in that nursing home. I spent so much time there that it began to feel like an episode from the sitcom Cheers where I would arrive and greet each of the residents by name as I made my way to my grandmother’s room. Once there, my grandmother and I would spend dinnertime together and sing Frank Sinatra and Johnny Mathis songs before I retired for the night. I often wondered about the residents who had no visitors. Who checked on them to make sure their needs were being met? Who kept them company when they got lonely or confused? And, who advocated for them when they couldn’t do it themselves? My heart broke every night at the thought that this is how we treat people when they get older and need us the most. 

After a decade of being a millennial caregiver, my time came to a close in June 2023 when my grandmother passed away. But those nights in a long-term care facility stayed with me and led me to want to advocate not just for my grandmother, but for all current and future caregivers and their loved ones. When I was selected to be a 2024 Caring Across Generations Care Fellow, I was eager to use my story and lived experience to advocate for better policies around how we care for the people caring for this country. My New York-based cohort of fellows come from diverse backgrounds, and while the reasons we care are different, one thing unites us in our advocacy efforts—the fact that Care Can’t Wait. 

When I arrived at the 1199 SEIU headquarters in New York City last week, the energy was electrifying. From direct care workers who shared how they cared for others while caring for their children to organizations who understood the importance of supporting caregivers, and elected officials who have made it their mission to fight for change and enact better policies for carers, I had never felt so seen, heard, and empowered. It became evident in this room that we weren’t alone, we couldn’t be silenced, and we wouldn’t stand for the status quo.

After a morning of hearing from change makers, we sent the Care on Tour bus off in style, as it embarked on its next stop where it would again be met by powerful advocates, partner organizations, and elected officials who would share their collective voices to advance aging and disability care, child care, and paid leave, so that our nation can have policies, programs, and a culture that gives us the support we need to care for the people we love.

*Stats referenced via Caring Across Generations