In the interest of full disclosure, I’ve never been much of a Valentine’s Day person. It’s not that I felt strongly about it either way, but to me, it was another day on the calendar (perhaps just a day where a nice dinner out somewhere was involved). Actually, I started this site nine years ago on Valentine’s Day in 2014 (fun fact: my first post was about finding your true makeup match)!
Now, as a divorced thirty-something-year-old woman who has gone through a lot of life changes over the past decade, Valentine’s Day holds a different meaning to me. As an only child, I was always comfortable spending time by myself. But, when I hit 30, I finally felt truly at home in my skin. My early thirties were some of the best years of my life, as I adjusted to living on my own again for the first time since my college days, started a new job that I loved, and made new single friends. Those years taught me the importance of self-love and being your own best friend, life lessons that have served me well as I’ve navigated many hard times without the support of a partner.
Ever since those early years in my thirties, I’ve made it a point on Valentine’s Day to do something nice for myself (but truthfully, I believe in treating myself every day). I always buy myself flowers on the day (see, I was a trendsetter way before Miley Cyrus). After that, I plan some kind of self-care activity. It could be taking a sanity stroll on the beach, hitting up an infrared sauna, or having a nice brunch with friends. To me, the whole point of the day is to celebrate yourself and spend it doing something you love.
This year, Valentine’s Day consisted of grabbing a coffee at my local coffee shop (with a Valentine’s Day note from my favorite barista), buying two different kinds of fresh-cut flowers and creating my own arrangement, and stopping at the bakery to pick up a sweet treat. I traded my usual brunch plans for dinner instead with my grandmother who just got out of isolation for shingles. And I capped off the night with a drink at home. In my opinion, it was the perfect way to spend the day.
However you feel about Valentine’s Day and being single or in a relationship, I’ll leave you with these wise words from Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City that have always spoken to me, “The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.”
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